There is NO shame in debt.
A pile of bills with looming due dates & minimum payments you can barely cover is piling up. You don’t know how the balances got so out of control & you spend a lot of time avoiding the big, bad total. Why does it seem like everyone else has their shit together while you can’t even handle basic financial management? If anyone finds out what a disaster you are, you’ll definitely never recover. You feel ashamed. Embarrassed. Humiliated. Mortified.
Sound familiar? Take a deep breath & let’s talk about why that line of thinking is total bullshit. Let’s start with the idea that ANY debt is a failure. Debt is a sometimes necessary & often useful TOOL. Don’t let the boomer mentality trick you into thinking that you are somehow deficient for using it if you need to. There is no shame in debt.
Read that again: THERE IS NO SHAME IN DEBT.
What IS shameful is repeating habits & patterns that don’t serve–or actively work against–your goals. So if you find yourself in a situation where you are in over your head & the debt you have accumulated has you overwhelmed & feeling awful about yourself, here are the steps to take control & shake off that anxiety:
Face it Add up the number. Have a cry if you need to, but no beating yourself up.
Get a plan Develop a budget. No shame in professional help if you need it (financial coach, bankruptcy attorney, debt negotiator, etc).
Check in on your progress Check in on that plan at regular intervals. This is NOT an opportunity to say “look how much I’m failing at this”. This is an opportunity to adjust.
Give yourself some grace Only pimples happen overnight. Effort, even if progress is slow is STILL progress.
Celebrate your successes Write it down in a journal, have a glass of wine and smile smugly at your pets, wink at yourself in the mirror. Whatever little celebration you like to congratulate yourself when you are making positive changes.
Big debt can happen to anyone. Rather than dwelling on the past, focus on the road ahead and what you can do to make things better going forward. Cheers to you for making positive steps towards better financial health WITHOUT the negative self talk!
